fashion unfairness

This morning on GMA (Good Morning America), the fashion topic was the oversized bags that women carry and the potential shoulder and back problems resulting from carrying these oversized purses or handbags. Why do they carry these giant bags? Mainly because that’s the fashion trend. If Hollywood carries something and deems it cool, so must the average Jill. That got me thinking about the unfairness of genders and fashion.

First, let’s look at purses. Why do women carry purses, especially these oversized ones that can cause a variety of issues? When interviewed, some women pulled out everything but their bathroom sink – make-up bags, massive wallets, checkbooks, paperwork, books, lunch (someone had a ziploc bag of broccoli soup), various kids things, photos, all sorts of hair products (some even full-sized), etc. Good grief! I have a smaller gym bag!

Historically, men carried purses. A man’s purse consisted of a leather drawstring pouch to carry coins, and was often looped through men’s girdles or belts for safety. Not until much later did women begin carrying bags, and then still for practical purposes. Now women carry handbags like they won’t be home for days. Plus they complain about all the stuff their lugging and how heavy it is! My theory: the bigger the bag, the more crap you’ll find to stuff in it. So, just buy a small bag and make the kids put their stuff in a kid-sized backpack. A small wallet with money, driver’s license, and insurance card; a small antibacterial hand sanitizer; a small pack of tissues; a pen; a few coupons – that’s all in my purse. What more do I need? If I'm going out of town, I have a suitcase (on wheels).

But men, what do they have? Wallets - a wallet in their back pocket - that's it. So simple and practical. Do they feel the need to carry an extra pair of socks "just in case"? No. Of course, the fashion industry preys on women, convincing them they need the latest trend. I say take a stand, carry a smaller purse or go all out and don't even carry a purse. Why do you need a $500+ handbag anyway that looks like you live out of it? Unless it can do alot more other than carry my wallet, I have better things to do with $500 and I won't look like a bag lady.

Much more on this topic later...

brainwashing, conspiracies, and UPS Trucks

An unmarked white, UPS-like truck pulls up outside with only a blue stripe down the side. Across the top, right about the windows, 5 red safety lights in a one-three-one pattern, although the fifth one is missing. It has the look of having been painted, as if white was not the original color. Rust adorns the driver's side top mirror. The dual windows show a small red plastic cup nestled in a cup holder, and blue notebook placed just outside the driver's reach on the passenger side. This truck only includes a driver's seat in blue plastic covering. The driver, looking remarkably like Kevin James from the King of Queens, emerges wearing a non-descript navy jacket with a white patch on the pocket, a white button-down shirt (untucked) navy pants, and black sneakers carrying his black baseball hat.. From the third floor, I watch as he enters the building, exiting my view. Moments later, he reappears, walks north toward the second building, and enters. His cargo and purpose, unknown.

In today's society of bombings, shootings, and just all-outcraziness, I have to wonder his purpose. Could this person and truck be up to no good? He parked (versus ramming his vehicle into the building), but maybe that's part of the ploy Or have I read too many David Baldacci books? Maybe I've just watched the news too much, and now I see conspiracy and doom behind every door. Maybe the news in brainwashing us to believe in water on Mars, global warming, and the Middle East. Maybe I have imagined the whie, unmarked UPS-like truck parked below. Heck, maybe I'm not even at work, but dreaming, or worse, in some kind of experimentally induced coma and all of this is simply a delusion. Maybe I don't even exist, but am simply a figment of someone else's imagination. In that case, I think I'll sign off and go to lunch. Ciao!

pet peeves & driving

Driving home yesterday evening, a car pulled out in front of me. Why is that a pet peeve? Because I was in the center lane, so this car completely missed the right lane & pulled directly into the center lane, in front of me, causing me to have to suddenly brake. Luckily, no one was immediately behind me. I started wondering why people can't pull out in the lane nearest them. If your entering traffic from the right side (on a multi-lane road), then pull into the right lane. Why is that such a difficult concept? I also wondered why people are in such a hurry that they could endanger not only their lives, but the lives of other drivers. Come on. In the evening, I am just as anxious as the next person to get as far away from work as possible, but not at the expense of other people (or at minimum, my car). After having my car in the shop for a week and a half from another hurried person rear-ending me, I can honestly say I fully support taking time and enjoying the drive. This time of year it's especially great (if you get off the highways and interstates). Last night, I took a new route home just because I wanted to see where that road ended. Sure, it put me out above where I live, but the time difference wasn't that great - plus I got to see an area I had never seen. And this time of year browsing neighborhoods is especially rewarding - I got to see all sorts of houses decorated in many different fashions (although some people need to learn that less can be more). I even saw one house that had their lights as a giant smiley face.

This got me thinking about other driving pet peeves that range from just nuisance to life endangering risks.

• Driving with your turn signal on for miles. Okay, this can happen to the best of us, but come on people, pay attention. After 5 miles, figure it out.


• Not using a turn signal. I don't know where you're going. So if you don't indicate your lane change or exit, I can't adjust my speed accordingly.


• Driving too slow. I'm all for obeying speed limits, but on a major highway or especially the interstate, slow drivers can be more dangerous that fast ones, especially when they drive in the middle or left lanes.


• Driving at a reasonable speed, but not passing (i.e., going the same speed as the car to your right). Alright already, just press the gas down a little more and pass the other car, then get back over to the slow lane to decrease your speed.


• Tailgating. Numero uno reason why my car spent the past week and a half in the shop. And a new police device that looks like a radar detector is actually a distance detector. Police in your area may be cracking down on tailgaters soon. My advice, don't do it. It causes unnecessary road rage and serves no purpose.


• Changing lanes when there's barely a car length between the two cars in the lane. Arg, I don't know how many times another car has forced me to tailgate because they assume the space I've left between me and the car in front of me is an invitation for them to get over.


• Constantly changing lanes, especially in traffic. The only rational I can assume is that the driver assumes it will get ahead of others and therefore will get to his destination sooner. If you're in that much of a hurry, leave earlier or accept being late.

I’m sure there are more, but these top my list. Bad drivers exist everywhere, but the south has more than it’s fair share. I blame it on NASCAR.

not wearing pajamas

As the holiday season approaches, I face the dilemma that so many travelers face when visiting family – the pajama debate. Typically, I only sleep in a tee-shirt. That’s it. No socks, no bottoms, no undies. Just a big, soft tee. In my house, we have not problems with this sleeping gear. And in we, I mean me and my cats. No one cares if a bit of bare fanny is showing, because let’s face it, cats are always in their birthday suits and as long as you pet and feed them, they could care less about everything else. But at mom’s house, this sleeping attire, or lack thereof, may cause issues. These issues include, mom rising early, the dog, grandkids running around, and various other family members popping in through the two weeks I’ll be home, combined with I have to use the guest bathroom – which is the main bathroom located in the hall – very easy viewing right around the corner from the living room.

I could just keep a bathrobe or sweatpants near the bed to use when the case arises for me to make way from the bedroom to the bath. But that doesn’t eliminate the problem of the grandkids. My niece, while adorable, doesn’t people close doors for a reason. And sleeping late with her around … not an option. Add the dog in with the niece and no pjs … you’ve just created a recipe for disaster.

With these thoughts in mind, I debate on exactly what to wear. My mom encourages nightgowns. Me, I can’t stand gowns because they wrap and twist around my legs. That’s no good. Another consideration, I could go with a pj set (top with matching bottoms), but again, the pant legs twist and ride up. Then I have the short option instead of the pants. But no one wants to see me in shorts, especially me, and besides, talk about riding up. . That just doesn’t make for a nice morning picture. In essence, I toss and turn way too much and sleep way to hot which is why I went commando in the first place. But in the spirit of holiday travel, I guess I have to go with the lightweight pj pants.

Now… where to buy some…

not using not

When I started this blog, I lacked a title… and well, really a purpose. Although, in all fairness I don’t think a blog needs a “purpose” per say, but you see my point. Anyway, I really just started using Blogger just to see what it was like. I got to the title part, and thought, oh shit, I have to have a title. Now, if you knew me, you’d know that I over analyze and agonize over things like names. To me, a name, whether it be for a website or character, should give a feel to the piece. I never just randomly name things. Come on, I spent 3 weeks debating acceptable titles for my website.

Trying not to think about it, I focused on my blog’s purpose. I decided to focus on my short writing – using the blog to encourage myself to write a little bit every day, and hopefully, use some of it towards a story I’m writing. With that in mind, I decided to use a short piece I wrote one morning in the coffee house part of a local bookstore (how I love Moleskine pocket notebooks!). Hence, the first blog became “not drinking coffee”. I then decided that was a fun title for my blog, and voila! Blog titled.

Now, this may have inadvertently caused a domino effect. I used the “not” in my second post, entitled “not going to the gym”. Now two is just coincidental – not a pattern. But then, I used it for a third post and now a fourth time (and I already know what the fifth post title is). So, after four, almost five times, a definite pattern has emerged. The question has not become, do I continue using the “not” and become entrapped and potentially stuck. Or do I go ahead and break out of the model now?

This I agonize over. Forget world hunger, genocide in Darfur, civil war in Iraq, or any one of the many problems afflicting the world. I guess that’s how people continue to live their lives without going insane.

not going to work

Most days I wake up and wonder why. Why bother getting up? Will anyone notice if I don't go to work? Probably not. Of course the day I don't go will be the one day my boss calls - unlike the days where I expect her to call and she never does. But I digress... I mainly wonder why I bother getting up because I don't want to go to work. I don't like my job (now there's a surprise - someone in corporate america who does NOT like their job). So every morning I have the same debate with myself about going to work or not.

How did I get to this point? I’ve worked for the same company for five years. While not a long time in the relative scope of things, it feels like an eternity when I allow myself to think that I do not want to continue on this path. I took this latest position deluding myself that it would provide a resume boost and alleviate the boredom. While many aspects of this role can help the ole resume, I can honestly say deluding yourself can only last so long. The aforementioned boredom directly resulted from my previous position consisting of periods of mind-numbingly busy work intermingled with short bursts of chaos. However, I can honestly say I’d rather be bored. Why? Two main reasons – the coolness of my former manager combined with his smarts (yes, some managers do use logic!) and I’m still bored. Not only that, for a serious increase in responsibilities, I seriously got screwed on the paycheck. Again, that’s one of those things I attempted to delude myself after the HR person made me drink the kool-aid.

So after five years, I finally come to the realization (for the 500th time) that I do not want to do this. But the question is, what is it that I want to do. Ah, the million dollar question. Obviously, if I had known what I wanted to do, then I would be doing it. Right? You would think so, but herein lies the problem. Arg.

Oh well. Off to bed to once again debate in the morning whether or not to go to work.

not going to the gym

I really am trying to get in better shape. Every few months I make a renewed effort to eat healthier and get to the gym more often... but as we know, the best intentions...blah, blah, blah. I have two main issues with the whole health craze:

1. Healthy eating takes too long to fix.
2. Working out goes against my natural state of doing nothing.

Okay, so I could make the effort to prepare healthy food. Nuking veggies doesn't take that long. But fresh are better for you than frozen, which is better for you than canned. Okay, but fresh veggies add time - you have to go through the whole hassle of picking them out, then they must be washed because they either have pesticides or just pests. Plus, who knows how many peoples grubby, dirty hands have touched them. Plus, I'm not big on cooking. If you can't slap it together in less than 5 minutes, then it's just taking too long. And this mentality leads to some basic foods: canned soup, sandwiches, cereal, and frozen prepared foods (read Lean Cuisine).

On the gym front, I can go consistently for about 6-8 weeks, then I just start finding excuses. And when I say consistently, I'm talking about cardio 4-6x/week for at least 45 minutes, at least 1 stretching class (usually yoga), and weight training 2x/week for 30 minutes. After about 8 weeks, I apparently get bored, because the excuses get easier and easier. Like today, I actually made it to pilates at lunch with full intentions of going back after work to do cardio. I even left my bag and sunglasses in a locker just to make myself go back. But with now 5 o'clock looming on the horizon, part of me says, I did pilates and can do cardio tomorrow... And so it goes.

And once again, the progress I've made is starting to go down the tubes. It's not like I'm obese or have any serious health issues, but I could stand to drop a pant size or two, slim down the middle, and firm up those arms. Of course my biggest enemy is the media. I'm over seeing too-skinny actresses talking about their battle with eating disorders and the pressure to be thin in Hollywood. Here's a thought ladies, don't take it! For once, stop being catty to each other, and band together and say enough! Force Hollywood execs to accept the fact that women should have curves, not be a flat-chested-could-pass-for-an-adolescent-boy. If we have to see 60 year old, not looking too hot, shirtless Sly Stallone in the new Rocky movie, then we can certainly demand more realistic looking women. Besides, I hate to break it to you Hollywood, but thin does not necessarily equal good actor. Thank you Kate Winslet.

So on that note, I will just head home to comfy sweatpants. Love me, love my curves. At least I have a chest (and it wasn't purchased). I hate to sweat anyway...

not drinking coffee...

I've never gotten the hang of drinking coffee. Lattes, cappuchinos, mochas, espressos. Tall or grande. Whipped, cinn, cream, sugar, low-fat, non-fat, steamed... Nope, just never have been able to do the coffee house thing. As a result, my life is tragically unhip as I look back at my failed coffee drinking college years and my decent into mediocrity.

Oh, it's not for lack of trying. I've sat in the French Quarter and ordered a cafe ole and beignets. I traveled to Nice on a train and ordered an espresso. I jived at the local coffee house with a latte. I even attempted coolness with a sumatra. But I still just don't get it. So I, the lone tea drinker, stick out like a sore thorn among the roses.

Now, I can no longer face going into the coffee houses. Friends talk and laugh as they enter discussing what brew to try today while I stand alone outside, waiting. And unlike parties or bars, carrying around a cup of coffee doesn't work. My life as an outcast, non-coffee drinker has been set.